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From turbulence to tranquility

A journey in three acts

Act 1: The EasyJet Waltz

Flying EasyJet is a bit like speed dating—efficient, no unnecessary pleasantries, and over before you’ve really settled in. The Toulouse-to-Bristol leg was textbook: no frills, no nonsense, and, at one point, no clear grasp of whether we were going up or down. The pilot, clearly a man of science, decided the best way to tackle turbulence was to introduce us to the joys of altitude yo-yoing—bobbing between 34,000 and 31,000 feet in a valiant but ultimately futile attempt to outmaneuver lateral winds. It’s hard to say which was more unsettling: the sudden drops or the knowledge that this was, in fact, the best available option.

Act 2: Hertz So Good

After landing with all the grace of a paper plane in a gusty park, Bristol greeted us with an unexpected delight—a car upgrade at the Hertz Gold counter. Gone was the economy-class shoebox on wheels we had mentally prepared for. Instead, we were handed the keys to a Mercedes 200C, a vehicle that exudes “quiet luxury” in the same way a spa whispers “you’re doing well in life.” The only hitch? Said luxury was encased in a cockpit of buttons, screens, and settings that, for all I knew, could have launched us into orbit. Two hours of southbound night driving became an exercise in figuring out which control did what—while also ensuring the car remained on the road.

Act 3: G&Ts and Grand Delusions

Arriving in Brixham, we were greeted by Chris and Julia, who know exactly how to welcome weary travelers: with cheese and Gin & Tonics. The first G&T was refreshing, the second delightful, the third borderline necessary, and by the fourth, we were philosophers. At some point, the girls wisely called it a night, leaving us with a genius idea: a whisky nightcap. Possibly two. In retrospect, this may have been the reason I slept like a well-fed cat in a sunbeam.

Conclusion? The trip had its bumps (literal and figurative), but all’s well that ends in a haze of gin, cheese, and German-engineered comfort.

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