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A summer of strategic scheduling

🍓Chapter 1: The Departure of the Famous “Bande Anglaise”
Three-quarters of Carole’s legendary childhood crew – the infamous Bande Anglaise – have just boarded their respective flights back to England and Belgium this afternoon. The fourth makes her escape tomorrow. One can only imagine the collective sigh of relief echoing through the household as the dust settles and the wine glasses are finally counted.
I’m seizing this rare moment of relative calm to tackle my ever-growing to-do list and catch up on… well, life. Because before I can say “croissant,” the final wave of grandchildren and their parents will descend upon us before the week’s end. Translation: I’ll be adopting full hermit mode – or at least staying within a very tight radius – for the foreseeable future.

🍓Chapter 2: The Mirage of August Tranquility
All this delightful chaos is gently nudging us toward August, which – on paper at least – promises to be significantly more peaceful. Famous last words, as the English would say. I’ve learned to treat such predictions with the same skepticism I reserve for weather forecasts and politicians’ promises.

🍓Chapter 3: The Great Cousinade Conspiracy
Despite the domestic whirlwind, I’ve managed to finalize an itinerary for our upcoming Touraine expedition. Mark your calendars for September 26-27 (possibly 28 if we’re feeling particularly adventurous): the second edition of the Great Sauvaget Cousinade in Uzès, Gard. Picture this: a gathering of the Sauvaget cousins (plus their better halves), following last year’s memorable inaugural edition in Burgundy. I suspect “memorable” is diplomatic code for “we’re still finding wine stains on various clothing items.”

🍓Chapter 4: The Art of French Logistics
Since we’re already committed to being in Touraine by September 30, it would be positively absurd to trek back to Carcassonne for a single day. That’s the kind of inefficiency that makes French railway workers weep. Instead, we’ll execute a strategic direct route from Uzès to Chambourg-sur-Indre, complete with two carefully planned overnight stops and a thoroughly researched itinerary for each waypoint.
My remaining mission: securing reservations at some truly exceptional restaurants along the route. Because what’s the point of a French road trip without a comprehensive gastronomic campaign?

🍓Chapter 5: The Great Deprivation Experiment
Speaking of gastronomy, I’ll be savoring these future culinary adventures all the more intensely because – brace yourselves – I’ve voluntarily embarked on a strict no-carb, no-alcohol regime. Yes, you read that correctly. Voluntarily. It’s been 17 days of this self-imposed torture, and I’m still standing.
Primary objective: bid farewell to 7 stubborn kilograms. Secondary objective: maintain this saintly behavior until early September, before our next Irish adventure. Because let’s be honest – once we’re in Ireland, surrounded by local whisky and Guinness, resistance will be not just futile, but frankly insulting to our hosts.

🍓Epilogue: The French Art of Living
So there you have it: a perfectly orchestrated summer of strategic scheduling, family logistics, and temporary self-denial, all building toward the inevitable capitulation to Irish hospitality. It’s the French way – we suffer dramatically for our pleasures, making them all the sweeter when they finally arrive.

Santé! (When September comes, of course.)

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J²S