Daily Post – July 28th to 30th

Living through a pandemic

in the south of France

495 to 497 days in Carcassonne since

1st lockdown in March 2020

DAILY STATISTICS HERE

▫️ FROM HOME’S NEWS DESK

✏️ Santé Publique France announced this Tuesday evening that the incidence rate continues to rise in the Aude region after exceeding 400 per 100,000 inhabitants on Monday.

The incidence rate in Aude published on Tuesday 27 July for the week from 18 to 24 July reached 425 per 100,000 inhabitants. On July 29th, the incidence rate has reached 459,08.

This is the highest figure ever observed in the department since the start of the epidemic in March 2020.

The incidence rate is calculated on a sliding week basis and corresponds to the number of positive weekly cases (on this 27 July, it concerns the seven days from 18 to 24) multiplied by 100,000 and then divided by the number of inhabitants.

As a reminder, positive cases are counted in their department of residence and not in their department of testing, according to the Social Security. A Parisian tested positive in Narbonne is normally counted in the positive cases of the department of Paris.

+74% more patients hospitalised, from 0 to 5 in critical care
As for hospital indicators, 47 patients were treated in hospital in the department on 27 July, i.e. 5 more than the day before, including 31 in conventional hospitalisation (+4). An indicator up 74% over seven days.

In critical care, the situation also worsened on Tuesday. Five people are being cared for in the critical care department, one more than the day before. There were none a week ago.

Ten patients are being cared for in follow-up or long-term care (stable) and 1 in another type of establishment (stable).

Zero deaths since 28 June
The department still deplores 368 deaths in Covid, a figure unchanged since 28 June.

Finally, 1,245 patients have been able to return home since the beginning of the epidemic, including 2 in 24 hours.

✏️ The mysteries of the virus

Can the Delta variant go back as fast as it came? Several European countries are experiencing a surprising drop in incidence rates: Portugal, Spain, the Netherlands, Denmark, the Czech Republic and the UK. Across the Channel, while the scientists advising the British government were fearing up to 100,000 new positive cases per day, less than 34,000 were recorded yesterday. This decrease is all the more unexpected as the country has just lifted its latest restrictions. So how should we interpret these data? Success of the vaccination campaign? The end of the Euro football tournament, which was the source of many contaminations? Unusually warm weather? The beginning of the holidays? Or perhaps all of these at the same time? Specialists are racking their brains and for the moment have no satisfactory answer.
In France, contamination continues to soar, but modelling is more optimistic
The British government, for its part, is careful not to be triumphant. Despite this encouraging trend, Prime Minister Boris Johnson yesterday called on his fellow citizens to “remain very prudent”. In France, the number of contaminations continues to soar, but the Institut Pasteur’s modelling has been more optimistic since yesterday. At the beginning of July, they were anticipating up to 4,800 hospitalisations per day. With the acceleration of the vaccination, they could be half that number. Despite this, the impact on the hospital system would remain “significant” from next month, the authors of this note argue, without “non-pharmaceutical measures”. Hence the interest of the health pass and the local restrictions that accompany its deployment. It remains to be seen whether they will be sufficient.

✏️ Travelling in the EU: how much tobacco and alcohol can you bring back?

Are you going to Italy soon and would like to return to France with a few bottles of limoncello? Have you bought several cartons of cigarettes in Spain? Beware, especially when it comes to alcohol and cigarettes, the customs authorities set allowances, even when travelling within Europe. The quantities of tobacco have been reduced by an amendment to the amended finance law published in the Official Journal on 31 July 2020.

Les franchises reprises ci-dessus ne s’appliquent pas aux produits du tabac en provenance d’Andorre 🇦🇩 pour lesquels les franchises prévues par l’accord CE/Andorre du 28 juin 1990 s’appliquent : 300 cigarettes ou 150 cigarillos ou 75 cigares ou 400 grammes de tabac à fumer.

▫️ SATIRE

▫️ TRAVEL NEWS

Travel Page. is up to date

▫️ MUSIC

▫️ FUN

▫️ THE FABULOUS FRIDAY (FUNNIES) GROANS from Paul

A bit time-zoned out this week. Enjoy the funnies.

✒︎ A lawyer was playing golf when he got hit by a ball. When the player came overlooking for the ball, the lawyer said, “I’m a lawyer, and this will cost you $5,000”
“I’m sorry,” said the golfer.  “But i did say “fore” .
“I’ll take it said the lawyer”.

✒︎ Did you hear that the world’s biggest optimist fell out a window on the 79th floor?
As he sailed past the 20th floor, he was overheard saying “Doing ok so far!”

✒︎ Two Mafia hitmen are walking deep into a forest in the middle of the night.
One of them says, “I gotta admit I’m scared out here.”
The other replies, “You’re scared; I gotta walk back alone”!!!

✒︎ My tolerance for idiots is extremely low today.  I used to have some immunity built up, but obviously, there is a new strain out there.

✒︎ Me:  Sobbing my heart out, “I can’t see you anymore … I’m not going to let you hurt me again.”
Trainer:  “Relax! It was only one sit-up!”

✒︎ Turns out that being an adult is mostly just googling how to do stuff.

✒︎ Do you ever get up in the morning, look in the mirror and think “That can’t be accurate.”

✒︎ I want to be 14 again and ruin my life differently. I have new ideas.

✒︎ I’m on two diets. I wasn’t getting enough food on one.

✒︎ The inventor of the auto correct has died. His funnel is tomato.

✒︎ Went to the hairdressers today and said I’d like the Beach Boys cut…
…the guy said you need to see Barber Ann.

✒︎ When a child says, “I want mommy.” That’s the child version of, “I’d like to speak to your supervisor.”

✒︎ St. Peter was at the pearly gates, making his usual list of names of people waiting to get into heaven.

✒︎ The first man walked up and Peter asked, “Who are you?”

“It’s me, Albert Jones,” the voice replied. St. Peter took his name and let him in.

St. Peter asked the second one the second same question, “And who are you?”

“It’s me, Charlie Anderson.” St. Peter took his name and let him in.

Finally he turns to the third, asking the same question, “Who are you?”

“It is I, Vera Chapman,” answered the third.

“Oh, great,” muttered St. Peter. “Another English teacher.”

✒︎ I went to the Missing Persons Bureau. No one was there.

✒︎ A defending attorney was cross examining a coroner. The attorney asked,
“Before you signed the death certificate had you taken the man’s pulse?” The
coroner said, “No.”
The attorney then asked, “Did you listen for a heart beat?”, and again the coroner said, “No.”
Then the attorney asked, “Did you check for breathing?”, and again the coroner said, “No.”
“So when you signed the death certificate you had not taken any steps to make sure the man was dead, had you?”
The coroner, now tired of the brow beating said, “Well, let me put it this way. The man’s brain was sitting in a jar on my desk, but for all I know he could be out there practicing law somewhere.”

✒︎ Some more puns

▹ Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft, and I’ll show you a flat minor.

▹ He often broke into song because he couldn’t find the key.

▹ A plateau is a high form of flattery.

▹ Once you’ve seen one shopping center, you’ve seen a mall..

▹ Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead-to-know basis.

▹ Acupuncture is a jab well done.

✒︎ A beggar walks up to a well dressed woman who is shopping on Rodeo Drive and says, “I haven’t eaten anything in four days.” She looked at him and said, “God, I wish I had your willpower.”

✒︎ I am in shape.  Round is a shape.

✒︎ Never be afraid to try something new.  Remember, amateurs built the ark, professionals built the Titanic.

✒︎ In just two days, tomorrow will be yesterday.

✒︎ Age doesn’t always bring wisdom.  Sometimes it comes alone.

✒︎ “Doctor, I’d like you to evaluate my 13 year-old son.”
“OK: He’s most likely suffering from a transient psychosis with an intermittent rage disorder, punctuated by episodic radical mood swings, but his prognosis is good for full recovery.”
“How can you say all that without even meeting him?”
“I thought you said he’s 13?”

✒︎ “Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case  very carefully,” the divorce court judge said, “and I’ve decided to give your wife $775 a week.”
“That’s very fair, your honor,” the husband said. “And every now and then I’ll try to send her a few  bucks  myself.”

✒︎ One liners ……

▹ There are two kinds of pedestrians — the quick and the dead.

▹ An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.

▹ Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

▹ When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.

✒︎ Some men in a pickup truck drove to a lumberyard. One of the men walked into the office and said, “We need some four-by-twos.”
The clerk asked, “You mean two-by-fours, don’t you?”
One of the men said, “Yeah, I meant two-by-four. I think?”
Then the clerk asked, “All right. How long do you need them?”
The other man said, “A long time. We’re gonna build a house.”

✒︎ The man passed out in a dead faint as he came out of his front door onto the porch.
Someone dialled 911.
When the paramedics arrived, they helped him regain consciousness and asked if he knew what caused him to faint.
“It was enough to make anybody faint,” he said. “My son asked me for the keys to the garage, and instead of driving the car out, he came out with the lawn mower.”

✒︎ Q: What dance was invented by Charles Dickens?

A: The Oliver Twist!

✒︎ Q: Why are scarecrows always winning awards?

A: Because they’re outstanding in their fields!